Lifestyle

New Years Resoultions for a New Mom

Soimamomnow.com (1)

Disclosure: Some of the links below are affiliate links, meaning, at no additional cost to you, So, I’m a Mom Now… will earn a commission if you click through and make a purchase.

Oh my goodness, the New Year is here! 2017 flew by. Of course, it could be that I am a mom but life seems to simultaneously speed up and slows down all at the same time.

Now that M is 6 months I feel I am ready to get my life back in order. I didn’t go back to work, so I have had a lot of extra time to go with the flow and just take it day by day.

Although, having just written that I feel I should tell you, that isn’t actually true. I do have a pretty good routine going with M and I get CRAZY anxiety when things don’t go along with the schedule/routine…Case and point…nap time. But I do feel M and I are making some progress, which means, I am ready to set some goals for 2018.

2018 New Year’s Resolutions:

  1. Make My Husband a Priority:

My husband and I have been together for 8 years, married for 1.5 years, and parents forIMG_2351 2 6 months. We both want to be the “perfect” parents, which is an impossible standard. We’ve allowed our “perfect” parent ideas and mindset to put our relationship in the background and M in the foreground.

But I want to change this a little. I want to put my relationship with my husband first or make it more of a priority instead of an afterthought. I seriously love my husband and our whole relationship I was always doing acts of service and using his other love languages to communicate how much I loved him.

I would make his lunch every day, I would make sure his coffee was set for the morning, I would take care of chores, and do things, in general, to help keep his life organized and running smoothly.

When M came I stopped making lunches (I mean rightfully so, I was crazy exhausted and had a little baby constantly attached to me.) I would often forget to set his coffee, etc. This caused my husband to feel neglected. Maybe that is too strong of a word. Don’t get me wrong, he 100% understood/understands that I don’t have all the time I used to have. But it was yet another adjustment.

So my first New Year’s Resolution is to make my husband more of a priority by speaking in his love languages. I will put more of an effort into performing acts of services, like making lunches 2-3 times per week to help him feel more like a priority instead of an afterthought.

**If you and your partner haven’t taken the love languages quiz I highly recommend it! The quiz is a huge eye-opener. Also, after having M I’ve noticed that my own love languages have changed a little. Which is super helpful for me, but also for my husband.**

2. Put More Effort Into Dating My Husband:

This sort of goes along with number one, but this part is really important to me. Do you remember, before you had kids, how much free time you had? You would wake up and think to yourself, I feel like going out for dinner and a movie… Or friends would invite you to trivia night at the local bar and that would be a great date night? Well, that doesn’t really happen nowadays, or at least not for us.

Now date nights take a ton more planning and on top of that, we haven’t left M with anyone yet, and honestly, I’m not ready yet. (I know first-time mom problems.) These all make dating my husband even harder. I am not ready to leave the house without M, but I still want to reconnect and share some time with my husband.

My resolution is to date my husband more by planning and putting more of an effort into fun at home date nights. At home date nights can be really hard to accomplish so I want to share with you a few amazing ways I plan on dating my husband at home.

Date Night In boxes: If you follow me on Instagram you know I love this monthly subscription date night box. This box is so great and takes a lot of the planning out of the date night. Plus it is always something unique that you wouldn’t have thought of yourself (or at least I wouldn’t have thought of for myself.) One month we had a whole fall theme, complete with fondue kit. Another month we had a Thankful theme, where we really thought about what we were thankful for. This month we received the winter wonderland box with hot chocolate, and a gingerbread camper to decorate.

I love this box subscription because it’s not just for new parents. It is great for everyone. From busy parents to grad students. In fact, I love Date Night In Box so much that as a secret Santa gift for my book club I gave away a box. It was so sweet because the person I gave it to, is finishing up her masters in special education, and said exactly this, “thank you so much. I was looking at your Instagram posts and was thinking about trying it because we are too busy to go out for dates.”

The other thing I love about Date Night In Box is how unique everything is. For about the same price as dinner and a movie, you can have a super unique date at home. Something that will really build up some memories for you and your spouse.

Dating Divas: I am in love with this blog/website! I found them quite a few years ago when I was looking for more creative ways to date my husband and have fun with him.

If you haven’t heard of them before, you really should check out their site. A lot of 7518828448_IMG_0088the stuff is completely free. They have already made date nights for you, you just have to print off the free printables and plan the date night. They have date nights that range from the “wink wink, nudge nudge” category, to family dates. Group dates to one on one dates.

They, of course, have products you can purchase too. From a divorce-proof your marriage boot camp to extremely beautiful date night printables. I just love everything they post.

I also love following them on Instagram. Tara, the founder, is so cute and so real about all the things she and her husband have been through (IVF) and how they keep their love alive. I just love them.

3. Make More Time for Me:

I wrote a blog post awhile back about Mommy Burnout and how to get over it, and one of the things I stressed in that post is making time for yourself! Now, I know how hard it can be to do this… I wrote the post and still haven’t really taken my own advice. But I want to really make sure I put more of an effort into getting out of the house, by myself, or doing things for me.

Being a mom is hard, exhausting work and without taking time for yourself the last thing you want to do is do for others. What’s that saying, you can’t fill up someone else’s tank if your tank is on empty, or something like that?

I totally believe this is true. When I am run down and exhausted the last thing I want to do is fill up my husband’s tank. So here are a few ways I am planning on making more time for myself.

Peanut: have you heard of this app? It is basically like tinder but for moms. ThePeanut whole idea behind the app is to connect like-minded women in your area who also happen to be moms.

I have a great group of girlfriends and we get together once a month for book club, but our lives are so busy sometimes, that once a month is really the only time we can get together. My goal is to make other mom friends so I can get out of the house more. Both with M and without.

Spa Membership: There are a few amazing spas in my area that offer monthly memberships. Each month you would get 1 massage and a mani/pedi, or facial, plus you get unlimited access to their facility. So you could use their steam room, hot tub, hot sand room, etc. throughout the month as much as you want.

I think this sounds like a great way to take a little time for myself. I could pop out for an hour or two every week and just have some me time to decompress. I am seriously giving this option a lot of thought.

Blog: When I started the blog it was because I needed something to do while the baby was sleeping beside clean the house and watch TV. But the more I started writing the more I fell in love with it.

But now the problem is I don’t get a lot of time to work on the blog. I allowed myself to take breaks over the holidays. But I really want to pick the blog back up and really make it a priority in 2018.

Since I am a stay at home mom it’s nice to have something that allows me to use my brain and connect with other adults out in the world. My goal is to have one day a week where I go to my local coffee shop or library and spend a few hours just working on it.

This seems like quite the list of resolutions, but I am pretty sure I can accomplish all of them. It might take some practice but I need to, not change my priorities, just shift them a little. What are your New Year’s Resolutions?

Soimamomnow.com (1)

 

Advertisements

32 thoughts on “New Years Resoultions for a New Mom”

  1. This is good advice about making your marriage a priority. That’s something that almost feels backwards when you’re a mom. We feel our children should always be first. Securing our marriage and making it strong and investing in it, makes for healthy children and a good example. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I could adopt all your resolutions. We have 4 kids and two of them are really really high energy boys so the idea of doing anything with anyone at the end of the day, is just exhausting. We’ve had a date night sitting on the counter since fall! I love these ideas. Good luck on all your resolutions, can’t wait to keep up with your progress.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I love your resolutions! I’m glad I’m not the only one who has my husband on the “must not neglect!!” list. I agree, it’s almost too strong a word, but it’s so easy to forget to the things we used to because we have so much on our minds!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. These are all such great resolutions; thank you for sharing. I also took a small break from blogging over the holidays, which was a great time to refresh and spend time with family, but I am excited to get back into it this year.

    I especially love your points about putting your marriage first and dating your husband. I can relate to so much of that this year. Hubs and I just had our new year’s date to talk about things we’d like to do in the new year and what challenges we had in 2017. Communication is a big area we’re working on this year. Like you, my husband is awesome and super supportive, but it can be hard to make time for one another with little ones running around. We have to be really proactive about it – so I’m working on that this year, too!

    Wishing you all the best this year!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I love that you are making your husband a priority!! It’s so important and the struggle is real when life gets busy with kids etc. We heard some awesome advice one, “Your life is a train and people will get on and off it. Kids will be added to it, but be sure when they get off you still know your husband, because he will be the only one left on the train at the end.” Not sure that makes sense without the context of the story ha! But it stuck with me:)

    Liked by 1 person

  6. As a mom of three, my husband definitely gets the last of my attention. I’ve heard of the dating subscription box so I’ll have to check it out. Also the dating divas website looks promising. We both work full time so finding time is definitely difficult.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. These are all inportant things for us moms and parents to work on. I can’t remember when was the last time my husband and I had a date night. And I definitely need to make more me time. Loved reading this post! Happy new year and congratulations on your baby btw!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Congrats and Happy New Year! I’ve got two kids and date nights with my husband are still a challenge for us. If a friend or my mom can’t watch them – forget it. It costs so much to hire a sitter…AND I still have a hard time trusting someone w my kids! So we do a lot of date-nights at home and we love it….I’ll be looking into that subscription box. Making each other a priority has made us stronger as a couple.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Congratson the babe!! Love your resolutions! As a mama of 3, I applaud you for realizing how important it is not to lose sight of your relationship with your husband!! It is so easy to do when you’re trying to run a household. I am working on making mine more of a priority this year too and look forward to trying out some of your websites. Happy New Year and good luck with your resolutions 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  10. I think these are great resolutions, especially as a new mom. It is so easy to get lost in your baby when he/she is born and put everything, including yourself and your marriage on the back burner. My daughter is 21 mos., and I have my second on the way. I don’t think it ever gets easier to prioritize things over the baby, but if you are mindful about doing it, that helps.

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s